Monday, February 6, 2012
In primary we sing a song called "Scripture Power". All the children love to sing it. The lyrics are:
Because I want to be, Like the savior and I can.
I'm reading His instructions, I'm following His plan.
Because I want the power His word will give to me,
I'm changing how I live, I'm changing what I'll be.
I'll find the sword of truth in each scripture that I learn.
I'll take the shield of truth from these pages that I turn.
I'll wear each vital part of the armor of the lord
And fight my daily battles, and win a great reward.
Scripture power, keeps me safe from sin.
scripture power, is the power to win.
Scripture power, every day I need,
The power that I get each time I read.
The kids in primary get a real kick out of raising their scriptures in the air when ever they sing the line "scripture power ". It's a great song and I can tell they understand that the scriptures really are a source of great power. Every fast Sunday I try to read my patriarchal blessing. In it, It promises me that I will develop a great love for the scriptures and the words of the living prophets. I have been more diligent lately to read and study my scriptures. I have noticed that on the days I study, I seem to have more patience and I can sense the spirit in our home. I receive direction for the little things that the kids I tend need. I am feeling that "power" that we sing about. I can't wait to teach our own children this song, and to read the scriptures with them. I started the Book of Mormon again this year and its only early Feb. and I am half way through Alma.
I read recently about scripture journals and was wishing I had heard of them before I had started reading this year. But I have decided that when I finish the Book of Mormon this year, I will start again and with my old seminary manual by my side, I will start my scripture journal. I have gained a great sense of calm and peace since I have been reading and studying this year. Our lives are filled with so much uncertainty at this time. Its not like being pregnant and having a timeline in your head... I don't KNOW for sure when we will be blessed with our child. Even after we have been chosen by a mom to parent her child, there is still this sense of uncertainty. We pray that once she decides to place her child through adoption that she won't change her mind, but there is always that possibility. Yesterday in church I looked at the relief society bulletin and noticed the sisters names that are "expecting"... I AM EXPECTING!!! I don't know my due date, but I am a expectant mom. I told the relief society pres. that I wanted to be included on that list as well. She happily agreed. There are many things that we miss as expectant adoptive parents. I will never feel a baby move inside of me. I hope that the mommy of our child will invite me to see the ultra sound, but that may not happen. I will never know what a contraction feels like. But I can still feel the excitement of being a mom.
I know I will continue to feel the great power of the scriptures. That and prayer have become my refuge. He knows who our baby is, and He will will be by our sides through this whole journey. I keep Proverbs 3:5-6 in my head "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and He shall direct thy paths."
I have to trust Him, lean on Him, and know that He is directing us and leading us down the path to our child.